My Soap Box is a Gender Neutral Bathroom

     When I was in rural Ontario, I dreamed of living in the city so I could attend university lectures in my free time. Googling is great, but nothing compares to studying the interaction between people in real life because - no matter how thin a coin is, it still has two sides. Well, I've lived in three cities with five universities nearby for the last three years and I have finally attended a public dialogue featuring kahntinetha Horn, a woman who just did things. Seems like someone I'd be interested in hearing about.

Photo credit: Melissa Ella Pole

     I insult the woman by saying that she "just did things"; it belittles her accomplishments. But, to elaborate, she saw a need for things to be done and she went out and addressed the issues. She does this without apology, without fake smiles and without any funding, in most cases.

     The "meeting" I attended was in the Carleton University Art Gallery in Ottawa, a place I visited regularly when I attended University for that one semester. I loved that you could get around campus using an underground tunnel, but I couldn't attend my English Literature class because it was on the 22nd floor of Dunton Tower and I was terrified of elevators. I always hoped I'd be able to go back one day, and was excited to be there on many levels.

     So excited, in fact, I had to pee. In a gender neutral washroom. With two men - one doing his business with his back to me at the urinal and the other washing his hands. It AMAZES me that a simple thing like voiding in the same room as someone with a penis is so fucking weird!

     I arrived early to the gallery to find a good seat and, lucky for me, only a few people were starting to file in, so I left my coat on a front row seat and proceeded to check out the amazing art work of Christi Belcourt. As I admired the intricate bead work with acrylic, and marvelled at how cool it was to see native Canadian flora (lily of the valley, lady slippers, Jacob's ladder) in a painting, I kept thinking I was going to lose my seat. Some self-righteous prick was going to throw my second-hand coat on the floor and I was going to have to throw a temper tantrum. It's hard to appreciate art and maintain an imaginary dialogue with an imaginary prick in your head, so I decided (it's that simple) that IF someone was rude enough to take my seat, I would be able to hear just as well standing anywhere else.

     When I finished admiring, I returned to my seat and my coat. A therapy dog was right behind me (SCORE!) and the President of Carleton University was the only other person in my vicinity. 

So Much Depends on Who Holds the Shovel

   Let's play, Six Degrees of Separation from Kevin Bacon, shall we?. 1. The only reason I had even heard about kahntinetha Horn was because I am a Letterkenny fan and I was obsessed with the character of Tanis, played by 2. Kaniehtiio Horn, daughter of kahntinetha. (If you think these names are too long and too difficult to pronounce, just wait until I start talking about Kaia'nereh:kowa - The Great Law of Peace.) Anyway, "Tanis" has a podcast called Coffee With My Ma, in which she talks to her mother about her life growing up on a reservation, which encouraged me to look her up. I was not working on a Monday night and saw via facebook that 3. Dr. Kahente Horn-Miller was hosting an Exhibition featuring 4. Christi Belcourt. So, I paid my $4 parking fee and sat down in front of a therapy dog and beside the University President, 5. Benoit-Antoine Bacon, probably no relation at all to 6. Kevin Bacon.

     Personally, I am fascinated by the interconnectedness of our species, in general. I've always tried to educate myself about the people who live on this planet with me and, often, I am amazed by the things I just don't know. I assume, because I am a white, middle class woman, that everyone wants to have the same opportunities, rights and freedoms that I currently enjoy. Certainly, some people do. But, not everyone thinks my rights (which are currently attached to my responsibilities and my taxes) are so shit hot.

     In her first stories of the night, kahntinetha spoke about The White Paper of 1969, which was a proposal to abolish all previously signed documents that set First Nations people apart. Everyone would be equal under the law and segregation via reservations would be gone. No longer would the First Nations people be separated from the Canadians! Sounds like progress to me. 

     When Jean Chretien, then Minister of Indian Affairs, presented the document to the public, kahntinetha Horn quietly stood behind him and shook her head. If I understand things correctly, she did not want to be Canadian. She is already Kanien'keha:ka and she wants the right to continue to live as one. Not everyone wants the same thing. Not everyone can be painted with the same brush. And, I realize this makes governing very difficult. But, you can either be Hitler or you can be human and try to work things out.

     Horn started becoming politically involved by calling radio stations night after night to tell her stories when she was just a teenager. She was told she was just a kid. Then, she was exploited by various indigenous and non-indigenous groups to promote their own messages. She wrote to the queen, she met with leaders, she travelled by train with her own money to talk to people everywhere. She was called horrible names and she was double-crossed. She continues to ask for change. She continues to demand we look after the earth. 

     When I asked her how I can make a change, how I can make people understand how I feel about what is going on, she deferred the question to her daughter. Dr. Horn-Miller explained that she had always been taught to know the ground you stand on - which I interpret as "You better know your shit.". Which comes back to her mother's other advice, "Always ask Why and then ask them to Prove it."