It's the end of an era :( The last Harry Potter movie (Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows Part 2) came out on Friday. I am, of course, very excited about the movie and very sad that there aren't any more books or movies to anticipate. I have been a "Potter-head" for several years now and even went to Florida just to see Hogwarts (or the closest available replica) at Universal Orlando last October.
     As a Potter-head, I never got the books on the day they were released or watched the movies with all the other regular people. I always had to go at midnight on opening night in full Potter garb so I could get it or see it BEFORE any normal muggle. I usually buy my tickets to the theatre WEEKS in advance and arrive AT LEAST an hour before the movie starts so I can get a good seat. This time, however, I left it to the last minute. I think part of me didn't want to admit the end was near, so I avoided buying tickets. Kind of like when my water broke with my first-born and I wouldn't go to the hospital because I was too terrified to have a baby. I have always been pretty good at lying to myself but, now that I'm older and wiser, I'm starting to catch on to my sneaky self. lol.
     Not only was I afraid to admit the end was near, I was also scheduled to work at 7 a.m. on Friday. Staying up until 2 a.m. and then driving home from Kingston, getting home at 3 a.m. and then waking up 2 hours later for work would be a bad idea. I had a feeling there would be a lot of snooty bastards wearing hot Nabob coffee and walking around with a fork in their orbital cavity if I pulled that stunt. I need my sleep. In fact, everyone needs my sleep.
     Therefore, when I heard that The Regent Theatre in Picton (Bless their little hearts!) were having a 9 p.m. show of HP DH1, followed by the midnight show of HP DH2, I was ecstatic! I announced via facebook that I would be attending "HP DH1 and 2" in Picton on Thursday night and asked if anyone would like to come with.
     Well, the response was underwhelming. Most of my so-called "friends" were confused by my acronym. Janet thought I intended to watch the making of printers (HP - Hewlett Packard). It could also have been that I was taking a course on the benefits of steak sauce, I suppose. Others have not fully embraced George Orwell's Nineteen Eight-Four Newspeak the way I have.
   Side note: That book is terrifying in it's accurate portrayal of human society, btw. Should read. No doublethinking.
     Meanwhile, back at The Island Family Restaurant on Thursday night, things are looking good for me. I have asked Ashley to do the closing duties so I can leave early and secure a place in line. The Regent is run by volunteers that cannot organize advanced ticket sales, so I actually have to do something in person rather than online. IRL sucks! The Regent Theatre Foundation.... there's no app for that, dammit! Anyway, 6:30 p.m. and I think I'm home free. I should be out by 7 p.m. All my fill-ups are done, the bathrooms are clean, the place is empty... except for that table of four. Oh, and one more table of four. Now, a table of two. Couple of more tables of 3... WTF!!! People, can you not see that I am trying to get to a very important movie!?

Me and Dev in front of The Regent

     I refused to take any tables. I gave up any hope of tips by bussing tables for Ashley and taking all the takeout orders for an hour. When the clock struck 7:30 (and not a millisecond later), I was out that door like a teenaged girl stealing lacy panties from La Senza. No looking back, hands in my pockets and trying not to look guilty.
     I went home to change and realized I had forgotten my purse at work. What a bunch of bullshit! Now, not only do I have to waste more time, I also have to face my employers who probably didn't want me to leave the new girl in a busy restaurant by herself. FML. Luckily, the only thing Amy had to say was, "Ohh, Sheila. You've gone home already?" I said, "Yep! I've got a date!" Grabbed my bag and got out.
     Meanwhile, Alex is texting me, "Don't even go home. Get here NOW." The lineup was around the corner and rumour had it there was no multiple ticket sales (i.e. you can't buy tickets for people who are not already with you.) At this point, I was speedwalking the two blocks to the movie theatre wearing my Green Lantern t-shirt and Old Navy chambray shorts. I would have liked to have the Slytherin robes I bought in Florida, but clearly Alex had beaten me to the punch because they were not hanging beside my bed where they usually are. My elder wand (the most powerful wand and one of the deathly hollows) was somewhere deep in the hollows of my son's bedroom, so I couldn't bring it either.
     Alex and Devon were waiting at the front of the line when I arrived. My heart skipped a beat with joy! Now, if I could just get tickets for Heather and Randie. Heather not only knew what I meant by "HPDH2", but also offered to watch it with me. I would not fail her.
     "Buddy", who manages the theatre, arrived late. He was one of the bastards who had come in for dinner at The Island when I was trying to get the hell out of there. He gave us a little warning about using video cameras in the theatre. Nevermind that after you buy a ticket, no one is there to take it from you to make sure you bought one. Anyone could walk through the front doors and push past all the people buying tickets in order to find a good seat. In fact, that's just what Heather and Randie did. Unfortunately, I had already purchased their tickets. I'm just saying... some security is in order.
     We got some pretty good seats in the exact middle of the theatre. The new seats are not uncomfortable, especially considering we were sitting there for about 5 hours, but the flat floor makes it impossible to see anything taking place at the bottom of the screen because even one row of heads in front of you impedes your line of sight. Heather had to read the subtitles for me (when Voldemort spoke in Parseltongue).
     Anyway, during the first movie, there's a scene where Harry visits his parents' graves. For some reason, this was where Heather got a case of the giggles. The woman just celebrated her 40th birthday and she's busting a gut, trying to start a popcorn fight. Well, this gets me started on some nervous tittering, thinking we are about to get kicked out of Harry Potter for being obnoxious. If I try to hold back my laughter, it just finds some other way to come out. Sometimes I blow a snort out my nose that sounds alot like a horse - which is what I did at this time. Other times, I fart, and I am glad that did not happen like it did in my grade 12 classic civilizations class. That bit of gas caused my friend, Alison, to fall out of her desk onto the floor in fits of laughter and get us both kicked out. Damn that Ms. Grimley!
     To make matters worse, Heather suggested we needed a slingshot to try to get popcorn into the balcony where Alex and Devon were sitting. I said, "Take off your underwear and we'll see what they can do." By this point, Randie is hiding her eyes from the scene with Nagini and Bathilda Bagshot, which is even more hilarious. This continues until the point where... SPOILER ALERT! If you haven't read the books and (for some odd reason) you haven't seen the first part of Deathly Hollows, please skip to the next paragraph. Thank you. SOOOOO, we get to the part where Dobby has been stabbed in the chest by that bitch, Bellatrix LeStrange, and he is dying in Harry's arms on the beach.
     Randie and I are bawling our eyes out. I'm sniffing constantly and wiping my eyes with the backs of my hands, while Randie is suffering silently beside me by covering her mouth with her hands and biting back the tears. So Heather says, "It's alright, girls."
     With red-rimmed eyes and a vicious, almost satanic growl, Randie and I simultaneously give Heather a death glare and say, "NO, IT'S NOT!" We were practically insulted that she could suggest everything was alright while Dobby lay dying! I'm sure the whole theater heard us.
     In an effort to keep the shenanigans to a minimum, I told Heather and Randie that I would sit with Alex and Devon for the next show. After a quick pee break, I took a seat beside Alex where she had been storing her back pack. She said to me, "You're not going to want to sit there. The guy sitting in the chair beside you needs both of those seats." I assumed she was overreacting and I think I called her a drama queen before going out for some refreshments. When I returned, there was a large gentleman in a brown t-shirt in the space beside mine. He politely offered to stand up and move to the aisle while I took my seat beside Alex. He was quite spry for a man of over 300 pounds and very polite. Plus, he didn't stink. So, I was down with sharing some of my seat with the fellow.
     However, trying to relax while I am leaning over into Alex' seat so I don't touch my neighbour, while Alex leans over into Devon's seat so she doesn't come close to her own mother (who obvsly has a bad case of mom cooties) lost it's cosy appeal after about four minutes. It was then that I felt my blessed smart phone start to vibrate and glow, indicating an incoming text. Who could that be?

              Heather: Who's your lil friend beside you?

     I look down to the floor seats to see her pointing up at me and laughing because my face has probably turned all shades of red, hoping my "lil friend" isn't reading my glowing, bold text over my shoulder. After all, I might as well be sitting in his lap. I quickly tuck my phone into my shorts and yell down at Heather, pointing, "You bitch, you!" I tell my lil friend not to bother getting up and I squeeze out of the row to go and sit with Heather and Randie, who clearly need my supervision.
     I decided I had to see the movie again tonight, this time in 3D. It's really much better in surround sound with 3D glasses, but I wish Heather and Randie had been with me. I'm sure Randie would have bitch-slapped the moron behind me who was giving a running commentary on the "believability" of the film.