The Wonders of Olive Oil

Me doing a hot oil treatment... just kidding. It's the girl from The Rite

     I didn't go out to see the French people on Friday night. I also couldn't find that Jura Scotch in Picton or Belleville. I don't know why I bother to make plans. But, all was not lost. I didn't have to work at all on Friday and I was going to make the most of it if it killed me.
     First of all I had to do something with my hair. It has been a frizzed out mess ever since I tried to bleach it last summer. OMG what a disaster. I've tried all the expensive shampoos with the hydrating, deep shine, dry damage repair, 15-minute miracle bullshit. I've tried not washing my hair every day to try to get some natural oils to build up again, but that just makes me feel dirty. And, not in a good way. I have heard of putting olive oil in hair (like a hot oil treatment), but I hadn't tried it. Friday was a perfect day to do just that. So, I put about a 1/4 of a cup of EVOO into a little glass and put in the microwave for 20 seconds. This could be dangerous. You don't want to be one of those idiots who goes into the emergency room with third degree grease burns because you poured a quarter cup of oil onto your head after leaving it in the nuker for over a minute or something.
     I poured the lukewarm oil over my hair while bent over the bathtub (there were dirty dishes in my sink) and I rubbed it all in, paying close attention to the tips where I am the frizziest. Then, I pulled all the hair to the top of my head and tied it with an old elastic. I figured if this worked on my hair, it might help my poor dried out face, too. So I grabbed a little more EVOO and rubbed it into my face. It feels heavenly! If you don't like to smell like Italian dipping sauce, you could scent your oil with some rose water or orange blossom water (which is edible and is available in most specialty food stores - particularly Asian or Indian). I spent about 10 minutes just massaging my face, it felt so good. If you need a little exfoliating, add some regular old table sugar, but don't scrub too hard. Microdermabrasion can be too much of a good thing if you're not careful. Since it felt so good on my face, I put a little bit on my dry, cracked feet. Poor little tootsies are always neglected, so I spent some time getting them all lubed up. Sugar is definitely a good idea to use with the oil on your feet cos it will slough off all that yucky, dead skin around your heels and big toe. Blech! Sweeten those babies up. By the time I was finished, I felt like a roast chicken that has sat on the counter overnight - slimy and a little congealed. It washed off just fine in the shower. I swear, whatever they are putting in our shampoo these days, it has super anti-grease, anti-bacteria, anti-odour, scrubbing bubbles. With all that excess oil on me, it should have taken at least a double wash, but I was lathered up like a best-in-show poodle at Westminster with just a dime-sized amount.
     The hair wasn't perfect, but it was better than I've seen it in a long time and I think it will improve with continued use of the olive oil. My face, however, felt so good I continued touching it throughout the day. I felt good and I was craving sushi, so I took my son over to Aji Sai. The sushi is good there, and it's all you can eat. That's very important if you have a 16-year-old teenage boy cos it costs more to feed one than to put one through college. He devoured four california rolls and two red dragon rolls within 15 minutes, so we didn't have to stay long. Aji Sai has good sushi (I like the butter fish sashimi), but the staff is nasty. They don't give a shit what you order, they bring you whatever pops up at the serving window. They don't ever smile and you have to order everything at once because they ignore any requests for more food (even though it's all-you-can-eat). We use to go there once a week and there was a nice server there who referred to Austin as "Four California Roll", although it sounded more like "Fo' Carifonia Row" when she said it. I'm not trying to be disrespectful to her or her English skills. We had no problems communicating, even though I still don't know the proper way to pronounce "edamame".
     I'm getting better with Spanish, too. I remember I took a dish of Paella out to a friend's house shortly after he lost his dad. I expained that I brought a "Pay-ella" that I made from a recipe in a magazine. Without saying a word, his sister politely thanked me for the "Pie-Ay-A" as I was walking ot the door. I remember thinking that was so classy. She didn't call me a stupid hick or laugh at my pronunciation. She just found a polite way to provide me with some basic Spanish phonetics.
     Anyway, Austin's Aji Sai name reminds me of how Dancing with Wolves got his name. lol. And, speaking of wolves, the sales clerks at Chapters are a little overzealous, aren't they? I took Austin home, brought Alex back to Belleville for work and decided to waste a couple of hours looking for more reading material before I headed to the movie theater to see The Rite. It didn't matter what section I was in, I had four different people ask me if I was looking for anything in particular and if they could help me find something. "NO!" I'm not looking for anything in particular and if I wanted to find something, I would use those handy computers set up on every corner of the store to look something up! So, please, leave me the alone!
     Sometimes, on a Friday night when I'm really bored, I make shit up just so I can give them something to do. I asked the one guy about this book I had heard about with vampires in it. I explained it wasn't Twilight, but I had read that one and I really liked it ;) I said I thought it had witches in it, too, and the authors name started with an "H"... or maybe a "T", I couldn't remember. We spent about 15 minutes searching for an imaginary book and I told him thanks for trying. I can't begin to tell you how many books are written about vampires these days. Hahaha!
     While I was browsing, I found a quote in one of those miniature books they keep near the cash registers that said, "If a bear shits in the woods, should I have a cocktail." For some reason, I found this unbelievably hilarious and I literally laughed out loud. lol.
     After that, I went to the theatre to see The Rite with Anthony Hopkins. I had to wait in a lineup at the theater doors, but it was not like their regular lineup protocol. We had to wait for the theaters to be cleaned after the 8 pm shows, so there were people waiting for three different movies in this one line. The blond girl with space googs and a snotty nose beside the line would politely tell everyone who approached her to go to the back of the line, but didn't explain that she would call the theater number when it was ready. So, when Theater 3 was ready, she said, "Three is open now." Only the people at the front of the line, could hear what she said, so I followed the few people ahead of me as they headed into The Dilemma (right behind Theater 4 where I was going), only to have to go to the back of the line. Meanwhile, the lineup was in front of Theater 1, which was already open. But, people attending The Mechanic thought that they had to wait. I spread the word about what was going on and soon I was almost at the front. The blond asshat wiped her nose on her sleeve and tossed her head, adamant that she had already told people that Theater 1 was open.
     The rest of the time I was waiting, I couldn't take my eyes off this bearded fellow next to me in line. His curly, straggly growth reminded me of my pubic hair on a 70's bush kind of week. Except it was reddish, and just a little longer... and greasier. I made a mental note to make sure I bought razors next time I was at Pharma Plus.
     The Rite was not particularly creepy, but I did close my eyes during the opening credits when the guy is embalming and stuffing a dead body. The pregnant, possessed, teenaged, Italian girl was very creepy and did a good job of being possessed. I jumped at least five times and, one of those times, I actually yelled out, "Holy shit!" Hopkins was good as the priest, but was less convincing as a demon. His attempts at the eerie blank stare were more funny than spooky.